paragraph evaluation 2

I corrected some of the grammar in my paper, and I tried to change some of the confusion and make things more specific. I learned that making specific points is very important and it takes some of the confusion in the paper away. It is for some reason extremely hard for me to think of ways to make my points more specific. Such as, I thought that all my examples in my paper were specific enough, but all my comments said that they were too general. What will make my examples more specific? It took me about 10- 15 minutes to revise b/c I didn't really know whatb I was looking for :/ lol. Savannah was a very good help. She made sure that I knew to make all my points more specific and not to get off topic. I did not end up making too many changes because I did not really know how to make my points and examples any more specific.